Congratulations! You got engaged. So, before you tie the knot, it’s important you know your partner’s views on certain topics and areas of life. Set aside time to ask questions that would spark honest discussions, so you can be sure of where you both stand and be prepared for your future together. It’s vital to have these conversations with your partner at the early stage of your relationship (that’s if you both were seriously considering marriage) but hey, better late than never right? If you don’t deal with an issue before marriage, you deal with it while you’re married.
We’ve compiled important questions to ask your partner before getting married as well as topics couples need to focus on. You do not have to ask all these questions at once, no pressure. Ask away, and listen to your partner’s feelings, perspective, and ideas.
Marriage and Pregnancy
27 Important Questions To Ask Your Partner Before Getting Married
Talks on marriage, adoption, number of children, IVF are very important conversations you should have with your partner before marriage. You don’t want to find out later that one of you is open to adoption and the other isn’t. Here are important questions to ask before getting married:
- Is there anything you would like me to change or give up after we get married?
- How do you feel about my family?
- Are you okay hiring a help to clean?
- Do you want children? And if so, how many?
- If we are unable to get pregnant naturally, would you be open to adoption or fertility treatments such as IVF, artificial insemination, egg donation, sperm donation, and surrogacy?
Sex and Intimacy
Having a conversation on sex and intimacy before you get married is key to having a healthy and satisfying sex life. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Here are important questions to ask before getting married:
- What do you enjoy most about sex?
- Is there anything that is off-limits sexually?
- Are you comfortable discussing our sexual likes and dislikes?
- Do you think I am physically affectionate enough in our relationship? will you tell me if you are not satisfied sexually?
Dealing with Conflict and Boundaries
One of the best things you can do for your marriage is to learn early on boundaries and how to deal with conflicts. Here are important questions to ask before getting married:
- What makes you angry and what do you do when you’re angry?
- Do you feel comfortable seeking professional counselling if needed?
- Would you consider divorce?
- What are healthy boundaries we need to put into play on having friends of the opposite sex?
- Do you agree to bring up any attraction you are feeling outside of our relationship before something significant develops?
Work and Career
As we all know, marriage influences your work opportunities and career. Would your partner mind moving to another state or country if you’ve just been offered your dream job? Find out. Here are important questions to ask before marriage:
- What are your career goals?
- Would you be understanding if I worked long hours for extended periods of time?
- If I get offered my dream job in another part of the country or state, would you mind moving?
- What is your perspective of having one of us being a stay-at-home parent?
It’s vital to know if the two of you are financially compatible. Money is the number one source of relationship stress between couples, so being on the same page early on is crucial. Here are important questions to ask before marriage:
- Do you have any debt? If yes, how much?
- Are we going to have a joint bank account?
- What are your views on saving and spending money?
- Are we going to sign a prenuptial agreement before we get married?
- Which one of us will pay the bills? Are we going to share that responsibility?
Morals, Beliefs, Religious and Family Values
Knowing these will give you a good sense of what to expect. It’s okay for each partner to have different beliefs, they are not expected to conform to a religion that’s not theirs. As far, as they support your beliefs and values, that’s fine. Here are important questions to ask before marriage:
- What is your definition of infidelity?
- Would you tell me a white lie to avoid hurting my feelings?
- What is your attitude towards drugs and drinking?
- What are your views on race, ethnicity, and religion?
Family medical history and personal medical information are questions you must ask your partner. This should be done at the early stage of your relationship if you were seriously considering marriage. These are medical tests every couple must do before getting married.
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