New year’s resolutions tend to focus on one’s self – self improvement, health goals, new habits and professional advancement. But what about your relationship with your partner? Just setting a simple, well-defined goal or two can make a big difference over the year’s course. If you want to have a happier and healthier relationship, here are eight new year resolutions you should have with your partner.
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Put Your Phones Away And Be Present
This sounds simple, but in some ways, this may be the hardest resolution to keep. This year, commit to unplugging for a period of time each day. Make a joint resolution to set aside time where you both put your phone away and just be present with one another every day. Use the 1 hour window you normally would have spent watching your Instagram stories to enjoy each other’s company in fun and enjoyable ways. Something as simple as completing day-to-day tasks together, or playing a board game can foster connectivity, improve communication skills and have a positive impact on your relationship.
Learn Your Partner’s Love Language
You are less likely to have miscommunication issues if you know your partner’s love language. According to the popular relationship book, The Five Love Languages by psychologist Dr. Gary Chapman, the way we communicate love for one another must be done in our partner’s love language. The languages are; quality time, words of encouragement, acts of service, physical affection, and receiving gifts. Often we show our partner love in our language, which may not be theirs. When we do this, we haven’t really shown love because we haven’t translated to their language. Learning your partner’s love language would grow your relationship on deeper levels.
Practice Gratitude Daily
Make a resolution as a couple to say ‘thank you’ more often. Resolve to thank each other for the small kind gestures and the big ones this year. That might mean remembering to say thank you for even the basic things your partner does like packing your lunch or more generally like the fact that they work to support you and the family. Letting them know you recognise their effort would make your partner feel more seen. Asides that, being appreciated would also make your partner want to do more. You would be surprised at the effect this has on your relationship.
Give Each Other More Compliments And Less Criticism
When couples spend a long time together, they tend to forget to compliment one another. This year, make it a habit to compliment, praise and thank your partner more than you nag. If you catch yourself doling out criticism, remind yourself to verbalize compliments as well. Nothing eats away at a relationship more effectively than a constant stream of criticism. The power of a simple compliment is one of the most under-estimated acts of kindness that anyone can do.
Say “I Love You” More Often
Say “I Love You” each and every day and say it like you mean it. Those three little words have a deep meaning. Also, when things get heated, saying these words mid-fight is a great way to remind your partner that your love is much bigger than a fight.
Commit to Doing Something New Every Month
As your responsibilities grow and you get busy, it may be harder to spice up your relationship. This year, plan to do something new each month. It could be something small, like trying a new style of cuisine, visiting a place neither of you have been to before, or even learning a new skill. The goal is to expand your world together and just have some fun. Doing new things together brings more passion, excitement, and adventure into your relationship.
Plan a Weekly Date Night
Date night is one of the best ways to keep the passion and romance alive in a relationship. It might be at home or just dinner out. It should just be the two of you, doing something you both enjoy. This year, make date night the top priority in your calendar. Resolve not to cancel or reschedule unless absolutely necessary. If a weekly date night doesn’t work for you, you could do bi-weekly.
Accept Your Partner
This year, stop trying to change your partner. We need to accept people we love for who they are and not who we want them to be. Anyone in a long term relationship knows how those little things you both do, start to annoy each other. Is it the way he leaves his glass of water on the table, or the way he never empties the dishwasher. The next time you feel yourself getting angry, stop and ask yourself if it’s really worth it. Have a talk about the little things you both do that drive one another mad. To gain a little perspective, imagine what your life would be like if the water glass or unemptied dishwasher wasn’t there (in other words, neither is he). When you think of it like that, accepting your partner for who they are isn’t that hard